In March of 2005, my girlfriend and I were able to take a long awaited trip to Belize. We had two parts to this trip, a week on an Island at Glover’s Atoll Resort, and a week in the jungle Mama Noots Jaguar Lodge. Overall the trip was very enjoyable and we have memories to last a lifetime, but be forewarned that you are in for a very “rugged” experience if you choose to go to Glover’s Atoll (kind of how Bligh had a “rugged” return voyage).
The first thing to know about Belize is that if you are late getting into Belize City and you are going to miss your local flight, do not worry, they just put you on the next one. It is wise to stand near the counter, as the PA system is not that good and our 3:30 flight departed at 3:10. From the local airstrip we took a taxi to the guesthouse for Glover’s Atoll. Glover’s Atoll Resort is run by Becky, her husband Breeze, their three children, and her mother. The taxi driver was excellent, acting as a tour guide and ambassador for the next half hour (we were not always so lucky with taxis but most were good). The trip was $40US. The guest house is serviceable for a night: it’s oppressively hot, filled with mosquitoes, has an ice cold elevated hose for a shower, and will be the best accommodations you will have for the next week. The next day we took the 6+-hour ride out to Glover’s, not really noticing that NOBODY that was getting off the boat coming from the island looked happy (which was odd because I was ecstatic when I was leaving). The ride was 3 hours longer than it needed to be because they had been hired to drop someone off on an island that was the exact opposite way that we were going.
The Good: The snorkeling around the island is the best I have ever seen. I have been to probably a dozen places through the Caribbean and Mexico and this was the best. The fish and other animals were spectacular, both in variety and quantity. The sponges, corals, crustaceans, and fans were equally nice, and the water was crystal clear. The water is warm, but we still wore shorty wetsuits as we spent over five hours a day in the water. It was not necessary to swim out that far to excellent snorkeling. If you like shells you will be in heaven as there are hundred of conch, sea hearts, sand dollars, urchins, and other shells right off the beach. The concept of the island was nice, with our grass hut out over the water. There were other tour companies on the atoll that I would have gladly paid more to stay at.
The Bad
· You must like dogs. They have four enormous German Shepherds that act like they own the island.
· The beds were infested. Some guests slept on the wood floor of their porches or in the hammocks. The ant bites gave me horrible rashes on any exposed skin, so I had to sleep in long sleeves and long pants tucked into socks.
· The cabins were extremely unsafe. The walkways out had beams three feet apart with one inch planking, at 150 pounds they would bow under my weight. Also, the cabins would have knee-high benches by open doors with six-foot drops to coral. Not good on a moonless night run to the bathroom.
· Finding our cabin already occupied, we asked Becky if we were in the wrong cabin. Her response was that we were in the right cabin, but if there were people in it then we should just find another cabin to use.
· We were expected to pick up palm fronds and clean the island for an hour a day.
· They did not supply toilet paper nor were we told to bring any.
· The prices would change without notice. The kayak rental rates changed from the tour, to before we rented them (up $25), to when we returned them (that was the half day rate, not full day), to check out (up another $10).
· Becky would mistakenly charge the wrong cabins for items, we would have to correct her daily about what she was putting on our bill.
· There are no showers, they have plastic bags with a tube coming out.
· Groceries could be ordered, but they would never be picked up for you.
· You could sign up to receive fresh baked bread and fish, but if you were not around they would sell your portions to someone else.
· One night Becky got rip roaring drunk on Tequila before she made dinner and spent the whole night screaming at the guests until only four of us remained for dinner. Seeing as how she was stumbling drunk at 6 pm, it makes me wonder about how well she did when she took people out scuba diving that afternoon.
· There were rules that were “oddly” enforced. Guests were told to sign up a day in advance for any meal they wanted. We asked if it would be OK if we just signed up ahead of time for breakfast and dinner for every day and Becky said no, we had to sign up every day. Every day we signed up except for one, when we signed up for lunch instead. During the drunk screaming incident, Becky yelled at us for telling her we would have breakfast and then not showing up. During the same tirade, she screamed at another family because they had told her they needed to cancel dinner one night and were going to wipe it off the sign up board when Becky told them not to bother, she would remember they had cancelled. She did not remember and blamed them for too much food being cooked.
· Becky would eavesdrop on conversations and scream at you about anything she did not like (She heard me mention McDonalds and she tore into me)
· The morning after the drunken rage night the nine-year-old daughter had to cook us breakfast because Becky was so hung over. I was not allowed to cook my own so breakfast took until 10:00.
· Meal times would frequently be close to two hours late.
· One meal was served three times in a row (barracuda).
· Immature conch were harvested within the park limits and served to us.
· When we first arrived at the island, we helped the crew unload all of our gear, and then went on a tour. Upon completing the tour and going to pick up my stuff, I discovered the beer I brought along was missing. When I told this to Becky’s husband Breeze his response was “that sucks”.
· We were given inconsistent gear instructions, telling us to moor a kayak where we were not supposed to, and telling us to grease an O ring in my camera that was not supposed to be greased.
· Someone had written that Glovers was awful and the owners rude in the Fodor’s guidebook in their library.
· The license they had displayed was expired.
· The owners wanted us to charter a snorkel trip from them, so when we asked where the best snorkeling was, they directed us to the worst spot we visited. Their 13 year old son tipped us off to the best spot, just off the beach.
· One guest chartered a fishing trip from them. He spent the day unloading snorkel tanks for them at another island and only got to fish off the dock during refueling.
· Kerosene was stored in bleach bottles, which are not rated for flammables.
· They would not give you trash bags. All trash is burned if not compostable.
· They bill themselves as an eco resort but they are not. We visited the island next door one day and saw a REAL eco resort. Glovers does not use wind or solar energy, only diesel generators. Glovers does not use true composting toilets, just holes in the ground. Glovers does not use rainwater runoff from the cabins for bathing. The only water is brackish, which is like bathing in salty egg water.
· You must bring food. The food they serve is minimal. You must bring food.
· There were not a lot of guests to talk to as half the people who came out to the island with us left early (at an extra $250 expense).

After all of that we were ready to leave Belize. Then came Kevin to pick us up and take as to Mama Noots. The funny thing was, he was the only one waiting to pick up anyone leaving the island, as Becky had forgotten to call cabs. Kevin was from Texas but was still a great person, almost as nice as his wife Nan whose family was the oldest rum distiller in Belize (try some of the good stuff, I liked it as much as a good single malt), together they ran Mama Noots. They had a gourmet meal ready for us within minutes, and local drinks blended from fruits growing feet from where we were sitting. Mama Noots was as perfect as Glovers was excruciating. The only similarity was when I saw a Blue Morpheus butterfly on one of our hikes. It struck me as for the week before I had felt like Steve McQueen in Papillon.
Mama Noots is nestled in a bowl of mountains in the middle of a national park. If Nan and Kevin continue on their current path it will be an Eden very shortly. They grow dozens of different fruits, with groves of oranges, limes, pineapples, mangoes and others. The flowers and towering trees were magnificent. There were monkeys, flocks of toucans, and jaguars roaring at night. Every day we would hike a different trail through ruins or to waterfalls. There is nothing like feeling you are about to drop from exhaustion to have the foliage part and be looking at an ice cold mountain stream roaring over a waterfall in front of you. Some of the hikes were grueling, but the wonderful showers (huge, nice tiling) and creative dinners in the lofty main building made every day special. We did take one day to visit the zoo (only local animals, but their local animals were a LOT cooler than my local animals) and Belize City. We took buses the whole day, which was a bit of an adventure. It would have been worthwhile to rent a car for the day but if you do not have the cash take the bus, it’s fun and will provide thrills to be remembered (ever race a fuel truck for a one lane bridge?).
Belize overall was a nice country to visit and we are both very glad we were able to see it before the current build up gets into full steam. I doubt we will be back as there are many places on this earth we want to visit, and after our first week we had decided Belize was going to be one and done. We wish that we had spent more money (or time researching) the island we selected, as the people running that resort were the only major issue with the trip. Mama Noots was wonderful, but Glover’s Atoll goes down as the worst “resort” I have ever visited. I do not need to be pampered in the least, but their attitude, behavior, and outright lies makes me hope that their establishment is shut down for the good of Belize’s tourist industry.

You said there were other places to stay near Glovers, do you know the names? So it sounds like a big scam to go out there and not worth the money. My wife and I are planning a trip to Belize and thought about camping out there....thanks for the info....any other advice?

Steelerprd -

I read howz account of glovers atoll resort and was concerned just like you (I'm going to glovers in late march 06). However, as I read more reviews and replies to howz posting, they uniformally defend glovers, to the point that howz seems to be in the clear minority. I'd search for these reviews to get a more balanced view.

What I have taken away from the other reviews is that you should bring your own food, etc. (read the website in detail), be pro-active regarding snorkling, kayaking, etc. activities with the management (you must ask for rentals, etc.).

I can't remember the other places out there - maybe slickrock or manta - just search around on the web to find them. The other places will be more expensive but appear to be better accomodations.

good luck (jcearl@uark.edu)

The following thread provides more views of glover's atoll resort.

http://www.belizeforum.com/cgi-bin/ulti ... 0;t=000588

dear howz , howzit you are so ill informed.

Guest , look at Belize as it is left by the british after all resources were depleted, mahogany, teak. Look at a 3rd world country and expect nothing more . take it with you or you won't have it. be a traveller NOT a tourist. belize pop. about 350k and the size of Massachusetts. Only in the last 4 years did they finish 1 paved road n/s to travel the length, the Hummingbird Hwy. do not expect infrastucture , night life , 3star service(no where near 5star) or glitz or a/c. do ecpect warm friendly people , beautiful water and sand flies. i have been to belize 9 yrs running the last 7 to glovers atoll resort. it is the only place i know you can go and enjoy mother nature as it should be. primitive camping , yes , bring your own t/p , yes , bring 90% of your own food , yes. the lomont's let you stay on their island for a week and if you do not want to talk to anyone for a week you won't. if you are a needy person this is not the place for you. when you read "robinson crusoe" on the web site "belize it" the beauty i enjoy of this place is snorkeling , diving , fishing , counting the waves , . if you need to unwind.. this is it. if you have had enough of people , go get away from it all. if you need service stay at home and let mother take care of you. excuse my typing.i'll be there march 10-18 , 2006.

Every thing this person says about Glovers Atoll is so true. We booked for a week but end up staying two days. The beach was dirty, the food was horrible. Becky and her mother screams at each other all day long. I advise everyone who is thinking about going to Glovers Atoll not to.